Reclaiming My Time: My Summer 2017


That’s how I would describe my Summer’ 17. This has been one of the best summers I’ve had in a very long time. I didn’t have even go to beach to see semi-nude men while sipping Hennessy margaritas for my summer to be lit.  I didn’t even get to see MJB in her “Reclaiming my time from the fuck nigga of a ex-husband” concert.

Rather than write paragraphs about why this summer was amazing, I decided to just give you a synopsis of everything that has happened.

Glow Up– This was the first summer I wasn’t broke as fuck. I received a long overdue promotion and pay raise at my job right before Memorial Day. And it came exactly at the right time. I was in the process of revamping my resume and considering  relocating for new career opportunities. Due to Atlanta’s ever increasing cost of living, I could no longer afford to live here with my previous position’s salary. Even with a roommate, I was barely making ends meet with my salary.(Side note: I will probably have a house mate or roommate forever because I am a thrifty nigga when it comes to living expenses).

The promotion and pay increase was a huge blessing. I didn’t have to start over as a new employee, relocate to a different city, or lose my PTO. More importantly, I can now afford to eat bougie Ramen noodles instead of the 30 for a dollar pack at the grocery store. In the words of Belcalis Almanzar: I ain’t gotta dance(or in my case, ain’t gotta eat $4 Wendy’s combos), I’m making money moves.

 Why You Bothering Me When You Know You Don’t Want Me?– Once again my hormones had me in a situationship with an old fling. Translation: We weren’t dating because of our opposing “sexual ministries” ; However we love to watch each other’s cum faces. Maybe even re-establish a friendship. Or so I thought.

His words were saying, “We should reconnect as friends.”  His actions on the other hand said, “I just want you as a bootycall and nothing else.” For example, he would always text “WYD?” around midnight. He would also just want to chill at house and not really hang out outside of the bedroom. You know, typical fuckboy bullshit. Since his words and actions weren’t matching up, I decided our interactions should cease. No sex. No pseudo-friendships. Nothing.

I know you’re wondering: What is so lit about ending a situationship with a fuck boy? My introduction to SZA and the CTRL album.

After I cut off communication with the Fuckboy, I was preparing to write a blog post about him. During my brainstorming process, I was coincidentally listening to SZA’s album. At first, I wasn’t not a fan of the album because SZA didn’t have any club bangers that I normally listen for.  However, “Love Galore” and its lyrics caught my attention. “Why you bothering me when you know don’t want me?” specifically. I decided to not to waste my energy on writing about this fuck nigga and just chop it up as an ending to my long ass sex drought.

#BlackBoyJoyCreatives– The highlight of my summer were collaborating on several projects with other gay men of color.  The first project I worked on was Prizmatic hosted by DJ Sir Daniel featuring the artwork by Ajmal Millar. Commemorating his one year anniversary of his themed, “Shuffle and Repeat” parties, this project was a dedication to the award-winning film Moonlight. The theme was In Moonlight, Black Boys Look Blue. DJ Sir Daniel serenaded the crowd with selections featuring Pharrell Williams and the Neptunes. Prizmatic was celebration of black men who aren’t afraid to confirm to society’s norms of toxic masculinity.

I, along with men’s fashion blogger Rah Mosley and singer/poet Che’ Devon were casted as the Orishas(or Yoruba Spirits): Shango, Ogun, and Oshosi respectively. Each man created choreography to represent our Orisha to compliment our chosen Pharrell produced track. Since Shango represents drums, partying, and ultimate male sexuality, I chose Twista’s Give It Up as my song. The bass and drums in the song was the perfect marriage for my choreography that consisted of hips gyrations and twerking.

Participating in Prizmatic was both a personal and professional milestone for me. It was inspiring to collaborate with other creatives who are also unapologetic. I was inspired to continue to think outside the box creatively and personally, embrace and love everything about myself, and to forever live in my truth.

Speaking of living in my truth, I had an opportunity to be a guest on one of my favorite podcasts, The Outline with Kevin Dwayne. The Outline is a mixture of pop culture, hot topics, and personal stories hosted by Kevin Dwayne. We spoke on the topic of living the pro-single life and why I don’t believe that being single was a death sentence, contrary to what social media tells you(Listen to Pro-Single Life).

To say I was nervous doing this episode is an understatement. I was concerned on how his audience would embrace my brand of humor and I didn’t want to be offensive.  After all, I have a tendency to be uncensored, unfiltered, and borderline politically incorrect. Thankfully, the feedback I received was positive including some people tweeting my quotes from the podcast.

Kevin Dwayne and I’s collaboration was an amazing experience. Outside of my friends and close associates, I have shied away from working with other bloggers, podcasters, and social media personalities due to my previous negative experiences. However, Kevin Dwayne has inspired to reach out to other collectives whom I’d like to collaborate with and not be afraid of group projects.Having Wild Thoughts of Becoming a Wild Thot- Another transparent moment: I have finally accepted that I am a beefy nigga(no, not thick but beefy) that appreciates nudity, love men of every flavor, enjoy new experiences and absolute loathe the summer Chelsea boot fad.

My new outlook on life lead me to one place: Jockstrap and Underwear Night at one of Atlanta’s gay leather bars. Before you DM me, no there aren’t any pictures of me in my jockstrap.

My initiation to jockstrap and underwear club night was overwhelming. The only time I’ve worn jockstraps were either at the gym or at the all-male spa. However witnessing men in various shapes confidently strut what their daddy gave them inspired me to the do the same.

It was great to see men dance and enjoy themselves in a judgment-free environment. No mean mugging, gawking or unfriendly hotties, just men mingling and drinking the night way to the EDM version of “Formation.”  Guys were flirting with me and actually buying me drinks.

Attending those parties taught me another lesson in loving the skin you’re in and body positivity. Despite on what society tells you, everyone is beautiful in their own right. Confidence is the sexiest trait anyone can have. Going forward,  I’m officially on my Rick Ross: sexy fly big nigga style.

Reclaiming My Time– Congresswoman Maxine Waters exclaimed, “I’m reclaiming my time!”  This summer, I did exactly that.

As previously mentioned, this was the first summer I wasn’t on the struggle bus. New opportunities, new promotion, and new outlook on life. I wanted James(my government name),  not Jimmie(the blog personality), to actually enjoy the fruits of his labor. This included take some time away from this blog.

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy writing and still love blogging about my perception on life.  However, I had to take care of myself mentally, spiritually, and physically. My personal life has always been sacrificed due to either lack of funds, wanting a new job, or other stresses in life. God has blessed me with so many excellent opportunities this year such as working with other creatives, a job promotion, and accomplishing majority of the goals I’ve but on my vision board.

Not to sound cliché’ but for the first time in my adult life, I’m finally able to just smell the roses and just live. No stress, no worrying, just enjoy life. The reality is life is too short. You have to enjoy every minute because life really does flashes before your eyes. Reclaiming my time!!

Now that I’m no longer job hunting or in relocation mode, it’s time for me to focus on taking my brand to the next level. Expect to see more posts per month. More collaborations in the near future. Stepping up my networking game(aka getting my ass up out the house). Last but not least, potentially hosting my first official  GrabYaJimmie promotional event. Who the fuck knows what will happen next?

Thank you Summer 2017 for treating me well. Thank you to all my readers for standing by me. Thanks to all the great creatives I’ve collaborated with so far. You all have truly inspired me to reach my ultimate greatness.

What was your favorite moment of Summer 2017? Share your story below.