It’s the that time of year again when the world is full of joy, Christmas trees, mistletoe, and presents. Seeing children’s smiles sparkle like Christmas lights at the sight of mall Santa Claus and hearing the soulful sounds of Mariah Carey and Donny Hathaway’s holiday classics on the radio brings out the joy of people during the holiday season.
However, Christmas is the most depressing and loneliest time of the year for some people. Either mourning a loved one’s death, getting your heart broken, or being far away from friends and family can lead to despair for people who dread the holidays. The R&B group The Emotions once asked the million dollar question, “What do the Lonely do at Christmas?”
What do they do, what do they do at Christmas? Not commit suicide contrary to popular belief. According to Healthline.com, December has the fewest suicides than any other month in the year. According to the site, depression is higher than normal during the holidays but most individuals find ways of coping with their depression by either drinking or other forms of drugs.
I will admit, most of my depressive state usually occurs during the holidays. I was depressed, like so many, because not only was I estranged from my relatives but I was also relationship-challenged and didn’t have a special some one. Using social media made it worst: visions of people eating Christmas dinners(even the struggle plates) and couples exchanging gifts would automatically causing my tears flood down my face, thinking why not me. What did my lonely ass do at Christmas? Eat ribs, drink Hennessy, and become filled with jealousy.
Fortunately, the last few Christmases have been outstanding despite the fact that I was single and unable to be around my family because I had my friends around. Surrounding myself with good company always cheers me up.
For various reasons, my friends also had to stay in town during the holidays. They either had to work or just couldn’t afford to make it home to see their families. Instead of moping around and being bored, we would get together on Christmas Eve, have a sleep over, and eat dinner on Christmas Day. This year will be the first time in years that my friends and I will not be together due to them moving way behind God’s back to Las Vegas. We will celebrate via text messaging nonetheless.
Besides hanging out with my friends, Christmas also becomes my “me-day.” What do the lonely do at Christmas? They get their much needed rest and me-time.
We all have a hater that goes by the name of Stress. Stress from our jobs. Stress from our family. Stress from our boos(if you have REAL relationship anyway). Stress from the world. Just unnecessary stress.
If my friends aren’t in town, Christmas becomes my stress free day. I would either take the time to write out my New Years resolutions for the upcoming year, binge watch television shows on Netflix, do a 2 for 1 at the movies, or just catch up on sleep. Resting is especially critical if you’ve been working retail during the holidays. Instead of feeling lonely on Christmas Day, just enjoy your own company with some red wine, a piece of red velvet cake, and a Scandal marathon.
Another great way to spend a lonely Christmas is volunteering. It’s never to late to sign up to help feed the homeless or visit the local retirement home. As the old saying goes, “It’s better to give than receive.” So spread some Christmas cheer to those who are less fortunate than you are rather than dwell on what you don’t have. Amen.
Between the struggle plates and “look at what my bae got me” posts, being on social media would make anyone depress(or at least say, “What the fuck?”). For one day, leave Facebook and Instagram alone and just celebrate your life.
Remember, Christmas comes once a year and you have 354 other days to spread love, cheer, and love to others. You’re never alone as long as you are able to just grateful for being alive and well.
What do the lonely at Christmas? Love themselves. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to ya’ll. In the words of Wendy Williams….