“I’ve been gone for a minute now I’m back with the jumpoff,” were the words expressed by the iconic Lil Kim the Queen Bee when she returned from her a much-needed break from the music industry. Similar to the Queen Bee, I needed break from blogging. And I must say I’m glad to be back. I hope you didn’t leave me and just know I didn’t abandoned you.
So what’s been going on with yours truly and why haven’t I been blogging? For one, I had to get “my house in order” as one of those gospel songs says. Between my work and studying for career certifications, I had to take some time to refocus on myself.
Refocusing on myself includes getting back and sticking to a workout regime and eating healthier, remaining stress and drama free(i.e. another form of losing weight: people who don’t add any value but always subtracting and dividing to you life), and reconnecting with my family(more on that later). I’m all about pumping out positivity and I want to keep that pumping at all times.
Another reason why I haven’t been blogging and I’m going to keep it 100..I got uninspired and discouraged with blogging. Plain and simple. I wasn’t inspired to write about anything that would move me(or the readers) and I became discouraged.
Blogging 101 is to produce content that will not only keep the readers engaged and interested in your blog, but discuss topics you are interested in. Looking at the number of hits my blog I was getting, I believed no one was really interested in my blog nor its content and I became instantly discouraged.
Comparing myself to other bloggers(first mistake I know), I didn’t really have a niche to keep people interested. I’m not a fem or androgynous gay that’s into the latest celebrity gossip nor a sex kitten(in the traditional sense) with tons of jack-off material nor a gay power couple. So where do I fit in as a blogger?
Another mistake I made is reducing my social media presence. Back in the day, I had a huge Twitter presence including my tweets showing up on social media episodes of Love & Hip-Hop and Real Housewives of Atlanta. However, Twitter became redundant and let’s be honest, a place where jackasses can tweet their stupidity in 140 characters or less. I wasn’t about that life and I stepped away from it not realizing this how I can get my blog out there and viral.
No social media presence equals no views, no retweets, and no sharing. As a blogger, It was a huge slap to my face when I would see friends mention or retweet links from other bloggers, especially on topics that I’ve discussed on my blog. This lead to my discouragement as well. If I didn’t get the support of my friends or followers, my content must be wack.
That was until I schooled the gays on finding real Atlanta trade and as the old folks say, all hell broke loose. That post became popular within hours of being posted, even among the straights. I was getting tweets from everyone including other bloggers that I didn’t think even knew I existed. Even sex clubs and bathhouses posted the article on their websites. I was elated people were now paying attention to the site and will hopefully read my past articles to see what I have to offer. (Thank you Ronald Matters at RonaldMatters.com for sharing it with your followers when I posted it by mistake..lol. I owe you one).
As popular as that post was, there was also backlash. Some people thought I was glorifying and oversexualizing black gay men. I love controversy. Hell, it was going to be line name. However, the critics failed to read the disclaimer: the article was written as a satire. Most of my articles, to be quite honest, are written that way. I believe laughter is the best form of therapy. Yes, I write about serious topics but I also like the find the humor in everything I write and post.
After talking about trade, I felt the pressure of keeping up the hype and focusing on the numbers. Unfortunately, my last post didn’t catch people’s attention and discouragement set back in. I felt like Lauryn Hill and D’Angelo after instant popular but people not really focusing on the message I’m providing and I went into hiding.
I also became uninspired to write. Writing is my first love and I felt like I didn’t love it anymore. It became a job. Especially since I wasn’t producing any new articles on the blog.
Since I’m being honest, I believed my art and creativity was being stifled due to my family knowing about the blog. So I kept some stories PG-13 when in reality, I’m more of a “Parental Advisory” type of fella. As an artist, the absolute worst thing you can do is censor yourself for other people because you might offend them. I had to realize people are going to be offended by something regardless, so don’t hold back on your talent.
Once again I became inspired to share my mind with the world again. Who inspired me to make another comeback like I’m Janet Jackson? Believe it or not, it was Caitlyn Jenner formerly known as Bruce Jenner. records scratch Girl what?
No, I’m not transgendered or transitioning into one nor I am a fan of the Kardashian-Jenner rodeo show, so let’s clear that up for first. However, Caitlyn’s journey has inspired me to not live my life for others but for myself. As much I as I don’t want to disappoint my friends, family, and now my readers, I must make myself happy and except things I can not change. Caitlyn’s transition has also taught me that it’s never to late to reinvent yourself. And I’m undergoing my own reinvention.
I also had to encourage myself and remain patient. I’m still learning that hard work and determination will pay off in the long run and nothing happens overnight. Thanks everyone for your support.
If you have any blog ideas, questions, or comments, please hit me up at firstname.lastname@example.org or my facebook page, Grabyajimmiedotcom.